March Newsletter
- 3 days ago
- 3 min read
The ABCs of Grief: Coping is Here!!
There was a book I read when I was young, I don't remember the book itself or the illustrations, but I do remember how the book made me feel. The paper had this cloudy glossiness to it, almost like looking through a pillowy haze. It felt so magical to the touch and turning each page felt like a gentle hug. I was maybe 9 or so, and I wanted to turn the pages of this book over and over again, taking in the words and the pictures, but also taking in the feeling of the book itself. When I opened my copy of The ABCs of Grief: Coping, I was shot back to my 9-year-old self and this memory of reading this random book. The pages made me feel warm, cozy, and hopeful. How crazy that a small touch, a small book, a small gesture can transport us back to some forgotten memory from our childhood. I started to think of all of the little readers out there that will consume this book and quite possibly create a memory that will stick with them into adulthood. Powerful!!!
This book was, by far, my favorite to illustrate and I'm overflowing with excitement that she's out in the world. This is the last book of the series, so with the excitement comes a bit of sadness. I've been working on these books since Leonora was cozied up and kicking away in my belly. Now she's 2 and forming opinions, interests, and full sentences. These books have been with me for so long, its truly bittersweet to say goodbye, and I'm so grateful that Jessica picked me to illustrate them.
As I painted this book in particular, I listened to the Harry Potter audiobooks to really get into the zone. But I also intentionally slowed down, savoring each and every paint stroke, pencil mark, and letter that I formed. I wanted to remember it all, and feel present for the making of this book more than any of the others. Because they truly have been a gift to me! A gift of learning about grief while I was also, and still am, grieving. To give some backstory, my mom started chemotherapy while I was pregnant, she underwent a stem cell transplant during my little ones first year of life, and she went through two back-to-back emergency surgeries during Leonora's second trip around the sun. She's recovering and doing better, but I've realized that while I have found immense hope and excitement with my new chapter of life as a mom, I've also been grieving this new chapter of life as a daughter. I didn't get to have the mom I imagined having during my journey into motherhood, and while my mom is slowly but surely returning, I still yearn for her to get here quicker. And also try to accept that the mom I had before may never fully return.
Illustrating all of these books about grief came into my life when I needed them most. They were my therapy! So, I am sad to see them go, but truly grateful I was able to cross paths with them during this season of life. I imagine all of the little grievers out there that these books will be a gift to, and it makes me hopeful to be of service to them.
This third book is all about learning to cope and continue with life while still holding space for grief. Sometimes that means finding ways to escape, finding hobbies, and sometimes it's finding ways to remember, like lighting candles and letting lanterns off in the air.
I pictured my Leonora while I was sketching these illustrations. What I imagined she would become, and what I hoped she would find in life. Picturing her going hiking (if she likes it like her dad and me). I also pictured my niece, who is having a tough time at the moment, and how she copes with dancing and video games. I pictured myself and how I coped as a kid during times of grief through reading and imagination.
Do you see yourself in any of these? How did you cope as a kid, and how do you cope now?
I can't wait for little hands and minds to hold and take in this book. Jessica's words have brought such a gift to the world, and I can't wait for you to hold these books yourself!
If you would like to buy your own copy, I included a link below.
I'm so grateful for each one of you for subscribing to my little newsletter,
See you in April,
Rachel
